Ugly Dishes, Uglier Weather & Some Damn Fine Music!

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I’m a “dish junkie.” Have been for too many years to count. I’m an obsessed collectaholic, married to another obsessed collectaholic, with a long line of ancestral collectaholics in the ‘ol family tree. In other words, I’m not looking to be cured of the addiction any time soon! I have; however, found a partial solution to make life bearable (and financially feasible) – I buy all the good, old dishes I can find (supports my addiction and need to “prowl”), and sell the stuff I don’t personally collect (yet) to fund more of same! Vicious cycle, I know, but a helluva lot of fun! That brings us to:

The World’s Ugliest Dishes

I have theories. When extraterrestrials arrive on the planet millennia from now, they’ll dig up the remains of the human race and find four things: 1) Nylon 6-Pack Rings; 2) Pampers; 3) Keith Richards; and 4) Royal China Co’s Dinnerware. Yup, transferware. The Holy Trinity of Transferware: Royal Currier & Ives, Colonial Homestead and Olde Curiosity Shoppe!

I am convinced that everyone in the known universe owns, or HAS owned a piece of Royal Transferware. Many refer to them as “Safeway Dishes,” as they were peddled at every grocery store in the free world back in the 60’s. Buy a dinner plate for .10 this week – and next week we’ll sell you the teapot for $1.00. Of course, the elusive teapots were always gone when the long awaited week rolled around, so you simply bought another .10 dinner plate.

No Thrift Shore, Junk Shop, or Flea Market in the US is without a token piece of Royal Transferware. That would be sacrilege! Why? Because you can’t sell the stuff for love nor money right now! It’s ugly! Back in the late 80’s, folks actually decided that this stuff was “collectible” for a while – of course, they were the same folks who liked Disco (tell you anything)? The trend died off quickly (thank God), and the offending dishes have now made their way back into the stream of commerce, clogging it up like a hairball in a drain. NOBODY wants these dishes. Don’t blame ‘em a bit.

So, if you are one of the incredibly rare individuals in the galaxy who has NEVER owned a piece of Royal Transferware, it is your solemn duty to go find a piece (and then get rid of it – if you can). Doing so will fulfill your destiny and give you the inalienable right to utter the immortal words: “Ewwwww! I had that stuff!” the next time you encounter a .10 dinner plate at a garage sale! You can always try to donate your unwanted transferware to the Pygmies in New Guinea, but I think they already have service for 40 and all they need is the teapot lid.

Hurricane Season – 2008

It’s that time of year again – Hurricane Season in the Atlantic and Gulf of Mexico! Texans react to hurricanes much like a flock of ground-sniffing pigeons to a car horn – they get up real close for a curious look-see and then explode in a feather-flying frenzy when frightened out of their wits – only to return again for another peek when things calm down.

I live in “central” Texas – a couple of hundred miles from the coast. We’ve had a record amount of rain in these parts recently, and flooding is no stranger to Austin. I don’t think; however, that we’ve had a major hurricane travel all the way up Congress Avenue any time in the past, so we’re fairly safe from worst that the Hurricane Gods dish out.

But you can’t convince us of that! Hurricane Dean is crouched at the entrance of the Gulf, promising to be a Category 4 or better when it enters our backyard kiddie pool of lukewarm water. Go try to buy a flashlight or a generator in the Lone Star State right now! Austinites are clearing the shelves of bottled water, batteries, gas cans and battery operated weather radios. Of course, no one in Austin will have use for any of this survival gear – and next Spring you’ll find weather radios, cheap flashlights, and slightly used generators for sale at your local flea market (right on top of the stacks of Royal Transferware). We’ll keep our fingers crossed for the best, though, for our friends further South. I can flush my toilet 3 times fast and flood half of Houston from here!

Moshing Flamingos & Some Great Blues!

I think I’ve found the perfect NASCAR post-race pastime! A free concert and an old movie at Videoranch - the brainchild of Texas’ own Michael Nesmith. Yes – THAT Mike Nesmith! He is remembered by many for his role in The Monkees, but his real claims to fame are the invention of the music video, the impetus for MTV, one of the first commercially successful “Southern” rockers, and his cutting-edge visions of music media which are lightyears ahead of the most savvy in the industry.

Based on the Second Life virtual world platform, Videoranch 3D is an online “resort” featuring live music events, discussion groups, book signings, movies, and more! Mike and Co. have built extremely lifelike and realistic cafés, lounges, saloons, amphitheaters, poolside retreats, drive-in theaters, and tropical islands; as well as some decidedly UN-lifelike fantasy features such as a giant floating Pie-in-the-Sky that can be visited and enjoyed via the avatar of your choice!

After Sunday’s slugfest at Watkins Glen, I found myself – like many racefans – with a surplus of adrenaline that left me wanting for SOMETHING else to do. I found it in spades at the Blue Horizon Amphitheater at Videoranch, where the “house band” Ranch Dressing were treating audiences to a live, streaming concert of incredible blues. In Videoranch, concerts are performed LIVE in the studio, and the band is actually visible live on the Blue Horizon stage. What’s more – the band can “see” the audience by virtue of screens in front of them, they are able to interact with the concert goers during breaks in their set, and avatars can “chat” with the band via keyboard. Sound quality is primo, and raucous classics by Jimmie Reed, John Mayall and Etta James are performed with gusto by an incredible group of musicians. There are no “bic lighters” at VR (yet) – so appreciation for the music is shown by turning oneself into a pink flamingo dancing a jig at the foot of the stage!

After the concert, avatars can “teleport” to the Drive-In theater, where classic movies, accompanied by chat, are a good way to kick back and relax with friends. Of course, during old “gangsta” flicks – users have a tendency to “chat” in the appropriate Cagney-esque lingo: “youse guys should check it out, see?”

I know many groups of NASCAR fans operate racetime “chats” during and after our Sunday roundy rounds, and hope you get a chance to visit Videoranch 3D and blow off post-race steam at this incredible venue! Who knows? If enough of us octane-sniffers haunt the resort – perhaps “Papa Nez” will build us a virtual track!? And wouldn’t an In The Attic podcast look great from the top of a Pie-In-The-Sky? (Yes, Pete & Rachel – it’s a hint!)

You can visit Videoranch 3D here and check out upcoming events!

http://www.videoranch.com/html/frhomepage.html